Thursday, January 10, 2008

For once - a good day!

So, I woke up today when Gregg's alarm went off and I couldn't make myself fall back to sleep, even though I didn't have to get up for another hour and a half. I just had this ominous feeling of dread, like I knew that the inevitable bad news of today's appointment was looming over me. (I stopped bcp's on Sunday and AF never showed up, so I assumed the worst, that IVF would have to be postponed or cancelled). I think I did end up going back to sleep for about 20 minutes or so. I shuffled around the house as I was getting ready, mentally preparing myself for the worst. I drove over to Gregg's parents' house so that his mom could give me my shot and then I hopped in the car and left for my appointment...in case you aren't aware - I had been giving the shots to myself until the fateful day when I hit a vein and got a lovely purple-brown bruise to show for it...I decided that I wasn't going to be a martyr any longer...if someone was available to do my shot, I was going to let them...saves me the stress of wondering where to poke myself.

Anyway, a gamut of emotions and thoughts ran through me while I was driving to the RE's office. First, I got really depressed and mad that we were going to have ANOTHER cycle canceled because of my body's inability to cooperate...and then I took a deep breath and remembered what God has been showing me...that he will not leave me OR forget me...and that worrying over the situation wasn't going to change the outcome...if we were going to be canceled, I had no control over it...all I could do was to pray...so I prayed that God would take charge of the situation and bless it and make it good...at the time, I wasn't really sure how He could do that, but time would tell...

I got to the RE's office and went in for my ultrasound...the ultrasound tech said something that was like music to my ears..."your lining looks good and your ovaries are clear!" - yay! No cysts - and apparently, AF somehow did her business invisibly...the nurse told me that even if I did start to bleed, everything looked good for me to start stims on Saturday - I felt like a weight had literally been lifted off of my chest! I couldn't believe it!! All I needed now was for my bloodwork to come back normal...so I waited nervously until about 4:30 and when the phone call never came, I breathed a huge sigh of relief! I can't believe we get to move forward for IVF #2 - I am definitely coveting your prayers right now...the whole ride home, I thanked God for answering my prayer from the morning and for reminding me that worrying will not help the situation, only hinder my relationship with Him...

I go back for my first follie scan on Wednesday! We just have to make it to ER this time! WE just have to!!!

1 comments:

Kristen said...

I'm so excited that it was a great day for you. And better yet, that you got the green light to proceed! I will certainly be keeping you and Gregg in my prayers that you respond well to the stim meds and that everything goes beautifully!